Hello Again, My Loves❤️
I hope this post finds you all well. I have not been in the right headspace for weeks now with all that is going on in our world. And like many others, it has left me emotionally and physically exhausted and depleted. It seems like one thing after another and every day I find that I am attempting to grasp at tiny straws to keep my anxiety at bay.
This week I finally had the thought of picking up my tablet to read again. And even the inspiration to be creative. This reminded me of a poem I wrote for a contest held in a discord group I’m a member of. The piece is titled Play This Game and it is based on the theme of being “bored in the house” during quarantine. 😆 It took a while to finish when I was working on it because it evolved into a much longer piece than I intended, but I had fun working on it. And I love how it turned out.
It tells the story of an engaged couple having to spend their time together while under quarantine. In the beginning, things are fine but as the days drag on their perfect relationship begins to fall apart. This isn’t a literal reflection of any romantic relationship of mine but the frustration in the narrative and the doubt that steadily creeps in were drawn from my own anxiety and frustrations during quarantine. As you read you will notice how each of them sees their relationship and the partner they have chosen to spend forever with.
I hope you like it🙂 I’m pleased to share it with you now. Here is Play This Game:
“Let’s relax and Netflix.”
Bored, but overlooking the urge to explore deeper.
Showtime. Food Network. Apple Tv.
Binge-watching anime is still the winner.
“Let’s walk the dogs.”
“Let’s try out that new cookbook.”
Day in. Day out.
This routine has worn me down.
Cosplaying as Asta and S.A.M. are losing its effect.
Do you just want to have sex?
Prickly. Hot. And constant.
The depth of my thinning patience,
Against your incessant annoyance
“Let’s replay God of War.”
“Or we can pull out the grill.”
“We can always just Netflix and chill.”
Permit me a moment alone to be still.
Breathe. Blink. Staring out at empty streets.
The stale air in this house, just shy of suffocating,
But I’ve found better ways to play this game
My tongue across your skin.
Salty. Bitter. Hungry.
I’m tasting a different part of you; unseen.
Corse, rough hands consume me.
Demanding. Powerful. Empty.
I thought I missed your lips,
But I think I’m just bored again.
“Let’s FaceTime our parents.”
“And watch-party with our friends.”
“So, you can remember the plans for our new beginning.”
I’m choked up,
I loved you once,
I swear my heart wasn’t a lie.
But you’re convinced being cooped up inside
Has morphed this boredom into an unruly monster.
“That’s what is playing tricks with your mind.”
“Come to bed. Close your eyes. Let your mind wander.”
I agree with your touch.
Loving. Tender. Sincere.
I agree with your assumed conviction.
Overbearing. Dismissive. A harsh puppeteer.
As the days linger on,
Doubt settles further
What entity in these four walls is the true unruly monster?
An easy smile and the grasp of my hand.
I submit but my mind begins to understand.
Cold. Unfamiliar. Forced.
Curl over to shield my heart’s remorse.
Desperate for a peace of mind that is my own,
I cry in silence while you sleep.
Is this boredom controlling me?
“Let’s clean up to stay organized.”
Nodding. I cannot refuse.
There isn’t much else to do
I have to play this game with you
Color coordinating what stays and what goes.
Blue & purple dots present our story’s inevitable close.
It cracks and weakens.
The house’s foundation is screaming.
Alongside our own,
I can no longer smile in this designated role.
Our relationship was built on BlerdCon and tethered binds
But we are not the kids we used to be.
Indifferent strangers from a foreign time
So, stop playing this game with me
Gesture to throw your fist,
“Let’s make up.”
“I need to make it right.”
“Let’s track down a counselor. “
Let me sleep on my own, for once, tonight.
Failed attempts to decode love’s mainframe
While we slow-burned cold in this obligated isolation
What did two bruised hearts achieve playing this wicked game?
If nothing else, an ironic and bittersweet self-reflection.
When these doors are forced open,
And the locks are released.
I will march away willingly.
But you’ll cling to the rotting memories.
Too much time wasted bored in this house
I pack up a box and leave the rest behind.
You try to snake around me like a vine,
But I am already halfway to the nearest liquor store for some wine.
~Play This Game by Gia.©~
Thank you so much for stopping by to check out Play This Game. Did you spot the anime references? 😄 *hint*: Black Clover & Buster Canons. I aim to be back at reviewing soon, loves.
Until the next post, be well. Stay safe.
Photos credits for this post: